Today, you are one person.
But you have this idea in your heart of who you want to be, right?
I find that most people have a blurry picture. But I’m challenging you to make it crystal clear to yourself who you want to be!
I’ll give some examples from my life. Examples always help 🙂
Being a Jerk
I used to be a very witty, sarcastic person. I always had a witty, stupid thing to say. Why was I this way? I mostly just liked using my brain.
But at one point in my life, this courageous person, a person I am grateful even to this day, said to me,
Have you ever considered how your words sting those around you? I see you are smart. Truly intelligent people don’t need to pronounce how smart they are. Think about the person you speak to — how are you making them feel?
For me, this was a huge epiphany: I frankly hadn’t ever truly thought about that. I was just being witty and smart-aleck. I realized I did not like who I had become.
That’s always the first step!
Forming a Vision
From there, I started thinking of who I admired. For me, this was a cinch!
I’m an UBER NERD! I love reading books about fantasy and sci-fi. I watch anime, drama, crime, and normal shows, too. But I’m a little weird: I read fantasy books to be inspired by people who don’t give up!
I love stories of people who keep trying. This is nutrition for my soul. The way I think about it is, the more examples of people I know, the more reasons I have to keep going when I’m low energy, tired or frustrated with my life.
So, I decided I wanted to be incredibly kind — like a monk that smiles all the time and generates lovingkindness! But I also wanted to be really smart, but not afraid to admit I was wrong (because I’m wrong a lot). All this seemed like a lot, so I decided to take it one step at a time.
“Today“, I said to myself, “I’ll try to only speak when spoken to. And I’ll keep count of the times I don’t say something!“
That day, it was 321 times.
The next day, I decided I would try to do one thing that would make someone smile today.
Over time I turned these daily practices into weekly focuses.
These small steps helped me see how I had changed very quickly. Often, I would fail at what I was trying, but I counted those times as even more important than the successes. It showed me I should focus on this longer. This process gave me encouragement and hope as I could see how I was changing one small bit at a time.
But most important was thinking about who I wanted to be.
Every day, I would take 30 seconds to imagine Super Ed: what would it actually look like if I could be who I wanted to be perfectly? I recognized this would likely never happen, but I would get closer by trying and it was that process in which was important.
Why This Matters
I thought I would write about this because I’ve been reading High Performance Habits by Brendon Burchard lately and he brings up the same idea. High Performers have a very conscious way of thinking about who they want to be and making conscious efforts on how to get there.
This aligned with my thinking because I think our imagination is incredibly powerful: we are much more likely to do well if we can imagine what well actually looks like.
I’ve made a neat image below that summarizes it all in 3 steps:
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